Weekly Discussion Group

Points of Light, a certified Teaching Chapter of United Centers for Spiritual Living, hosts a weekly reading and discussion group. Please feel free to join us any time.
WEDNESDAYS, 5:30-7:00 pm at Ann Arbor Interfaith Center (Click for a MAP)

Next Meeting: January 6, 2010

Erin's Blog

The Journal of Erin Fry, RScP - Points of Light's Founder and Facilitator.

Friday, August 21, 2009

Adrian

Recently I joined a marketing group called BNI. We meet weekly and set aside a few minutes every week to mingle and talk informally about our businesses. During the mingle time last week I noticed one of the gentlemen was wearing a large class ring with the letter “A” on it. A few years ago I would have had a lot of judgments about a 40 something year old wearing a school ring. However, I have done a lot of work to rid myself of prejudices --- including an old and unwarranted bias against jocks, so this time, it was just something I noticed.

Yesterday, this gentleman and I met for a "One-to-One" to learn about each other’s businesses so that we can give better referrals.

He walked with a slight limp which I assumed came from a football injury. He shared that he had played football at Adrian College. But contrary to my presumption, the leg injury occurred later. About 13 years ago he was involved in a serious motorcycle accident and ended up in a ditch with his femur sticking out into the air. Somehow he mustered up the strength to crawl out of the ditch; and as life would have it, a World War II veteran was passing by and rushed to his aid. Together they tied off the leg to prevent more blood loss. The veteran said he had seen many people in the war with lesser injuries who did not survive.

As I listened to this story it occurred to me that the football training of his youth had saved his life. I now saw the class ring in a new light, as an affirmation of life itself. I pointed to the letter “A” on his finger and said "This ring saved your life." (Turns out the word Adrian means "strong" in several languages.)

Today on the drive up north Barnaby and I listen to Friday Night Lives, an NPR series on high school football for the 2009 season. I am reminded of my football player friend and am grateful to all those football coaches and players out there who show us how to survive and persevere.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Loyola


A few weeks ago our friend Joanna was visiting from L.A. We met downtown Ann Arbor and had a nice leisurely stroll around campus and eventually ended up adjacent to the law quad. As we walked by she said "Every time my father walks near the law school he still feels sick to his stomach --- and he graduated in 1951."

Hearing this reminded me of how grateful I am to have attended Loyola University Chicago School of Law. Although law school in general is not much fun, I greatly appreciate having gone to a school with a focus on collaboration and cooperation. The charge to us students was that being a lawyer means being of service. The question we were asked is “How are you going to use your law degree to make the world a better place?”

Today, as I sit in a lawyer’s office and align myself with the collaborative divorce process, I again affirm my gratitude for the training I received at Loyola, where this type of approach was the norm.

In writing this blog I went to the websites of both University of Michigan and Loyola to find their mission statements. Here is what I found:

  • Loyola University Chicago School of Law is a student-focused law center inspired by the Jesuit tradition of academic excellence, intellectual openness, and service to others. Our mission is to educate diverse, talented students to be responsible leaders in a rapidly changing, interdependent world, to prepare graduates who will be ethical advocates for justice and the rule of law, and to contribute to a deeper understanding of law and legal institutions through a commitment to research, scholarship and public service.

I was unable to locate the mission of U of M's law school.

In retrospect, I am honored to have been accepted at both of these schools and I am glad I chose Loyola. It was a much better fit for me.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Inbox













Today Barnaby and I sat down to go through “The Mail Bag.”
Over the years this has become easier and easier as we have fewer and fewer pieces of mail. One of the reasons we have so little mail is that we no longer own a home or rent an apartment, so this cuts down on the bills we receive. But the big change really occurred when I decided that I no longer wanted any junk mail.

I went on a crusade to eliminate unwanted mail. This decision was the result of taking classes at our local spiritual centers which raised our awareness about our mental inbox. I figured if it was important to be conscious of my thoughts, then it was also important to monitor what was coming into our physical mailbox.

Every time we receive a piece of mail that we do not want I set it aside and make a phone call. I have a spreadsheet and log every call. That way if we do not stop receiving mail after 4-6 weeks like they tell me, then I can call back and have a record of when I called and who I spoke to previously. We are on a no mail list and the “Opt Out Department” for credit card applications.

 
Over time the unwanted mail has dwindled, but just like my thoughts, this takes ongoing attention. I am grateful for the new awareness of my thoughts and the power to choose what goes into my inbox.

What is in your inbox?

Sunday, August 9, 2009

6 Harmonies


Today was my first time at a Zen center. I had received an email from the Interfaith listserv about a special guest coming to the Ann Arbor Zen Temple on August 16th. The idea of attending a Zen service intrigued me, especially since two of my prayer partners are involved in Buddhist practices.

Barnaby was willing to go, so we made an adventure out of it. I was surprised to learn that the Zen Temple has been in Ann Arbor since 1981. Another aspect of life I was not aware of when growing up here in the 80’s.

Everyone at the Zen Temple was friendly and helpful in answering our questions. I especially enjoyed the dharma talk on the 6 Harmonies, which are the principles for living harmoniously in a group.

One of the 6 Harmonies is speaking without conflict and was described as speaking from the heart. This topic is particularly relevant to me as I am actively promoting the use and practice of Marshall Rosenberg’s Compassionate Communication process (also called Nonviolent Communication). So when I realized that I was a week early for the special guest speaker I knew that I was right on time for what I needed to hear today.

I am grateful to know that I am always exactly where I need to be.

Saturday, August 8, 2009

Rainy Day Possibilities

Today is a beautiful rainy day. It has been raining steadily all morning and I was relieved because it meant that we could just relax and see what the day brings as opposed to running out and working in the yard. It was like having a bonus day or a snow day where all previously scheduled activities are suspended.

I wanted to do my blog so I came downstairs to get the computer. Judy asked what I was going to write about and whether or not I was feeling inspired. She offered the idea of the day being full of possibility given that it was raining. She said she felt inspired to make crepes with her bonus time. For toppings she made fresh applesauce and blueberry sauce from the fruit she bought at the Holland Farmer’s Market. She heated a bottle of syrup and a jar of Brownwood’s Famous Cherry Butter, which is one of my all time favorites.

While we were waiting for the batter I wrote thank you notes and worked on my blog. Barnaby rested from his medical procedure and Richard was under the house working on the ventilation. We were each doing our own thing at a nice natural pace and when breakfast was ready we gathered at the table.

I started with the blueberries because of seeing the PBS broadcast of “Change Your Brain, Change Your Life.” Then I moved to the applesauce, then the cherry butter and finally to syrup for my last crepe. A perfect day so far and it is not even noon. I am grateful for how this day unfolds.

Friday, August 7, 2009

I AM


In setting my intention today I started with the words “I am…”

I waited for something else to follow but nothing else came so I concluded that my intention for the day was simply to be. Not to be this or that, but just to be.

The day progressed and I accomplished about one half of the tasks on my to do list. I told myself it was ok since my intention for the day was to be (not to do).

In the evening I went to the Chelsea Wellness Center where I opted for the warm pool rather than the exercise bike or the treadmill --- or the cold pool! Whenever I am in the warm pool I face the deep end so I can look out at the trees and I usually repeat an affirmation as I do my exercises.

Today rather than affirming I am this or that, I decided to just repeat the words “I am.” This had a calming affect and I ended up focusing on one tree in particular that seemed to represent my intention/affirmation for the day. It was the tallest tree I could see with the darkest and largest trunk. Silent, still and strong.

When I was done exercising I felt more grounded and connected to these qualities in myself. I am so grateful to be back in Michigan where I am always surrounded by trees.

Affirmation: I revel in my beingness.

Friday, July 24, 2009

Trust

A few weeks ago I lead the Fear to Faith Process for some teenaged girls. One of the great things about this process is that everyone can be working on their own issue and no one else needs to know the issue being worked on --- not even the facilitator. The participants may choose to share their issue, but there is no expectation that they do so.

As I was guiding the young women through the process I decided I would take the opportunity to apply it to myself. The issue I chose to address was the anxiety I was feeling about the upcoming listing of my business in the Crazy Wisdom Community Journal. I took notes as we went along and when the process was complete the word “Trust” was my keyword.

I confess that I put my piece of paper who-knows-where and essentially forgot all about it. Until yesterday when I was doing another technique that took me to the concept of Trust around a different issue. Of course, not remembering the earlier Fear to Faith process, I thought this was new! Immediately afterward I found the paper with my notes and I was surprised to see Trust as my keyword.

It seems that whenever I am developing myself in a given area, I get the same message or reminder or lesson from many different places. No matter how many times I have experienced this, I am still amazed.